As a care home singer, every now and then I become aware of someone in the residents’ lounge who appears determined not to enjoy themselves.

I was reminded of this during a performance at a care home in Surbiton. One resident made it very clear from the beginning that they weren’t particularly interested in being entertained. And that’s okay.

Sometimes people sit with folded arms, give very little away, or even tell you exactly what they think. They might not want to join in, and they might make that quite clear.

But after years of performing in care homes, I’ve developed a bit of a sixth sense. The people who seem least interested at the start are most often the ones I quietly think, “Give it time.”

And that’s exactly what happened that day. As the performance unfolded, the barriers started to come down. A shared joke, a warm exchange, and the right familiar songs began to make a difference.

Before long, that same resident who had seemed so determined not to enjoy themselves was joining in, chatting with me, and by the end of the performance asking, “When are you coming back?”

Moments like that remind me why I never judge a first impression. Sometimes all someone needs is a little time, a little encouragement, and to feel included.

That’s one of the things I love most about being a care home singer and entertainer. It’s never just about the music; it’s about people. Every resident has their own story, their own personality and their own way of connecting. Being able to find that connection is a privilege, and it’s why I love what I do.

Every performance is an opportunity to create moments that matter